When we aim to improve our relationships and live peacefully, no one would disagree that our words and actions are vital. But what exactly defines “good words”? Buddhist teachings offer a simple answer: words that do not cause oneself suffering, words that do not hurt others, words that are beautiful and rational, and above all, words that are truthful.
Up to this point, most people would likely nod in agreement. However, the real challenge lies just beyond that.
We often encounter people whose values differ from our own. In those moments, it is easy to fall into the trap of thinking, “They are wrong, and I am right.” Out of a misplaced sense of kindness, we try to “fix” their thinking. If we take this too far, it can even turn into a desire to defeat or conquer them.
We all live among people with different values. While I exist within that community, I believe it is important to maintain a stance of “not merging and not being stained.” And even more importantly, we must not try to “stain” others with our own beliefs. We should never try to correct someone else’s thoughts to make them conform to our own. It is about being mindful—ensuring that the ego does not take the lead.