While values tend to vary from country to country, they also differ from person to person. Recently, however, social media has been spreading identical values globally, regardless of national borders. A prime example of this is “lookism.” Lookism refers to the harmful effects that arise from placing an excessive emphasis on physical appearance. As always, my goal here is not to analyze lookism itself. Instead, I’d like to consider a little bit of wisdom—just enough to keep us from stepping into that particular pitfall.
I believe there are two distinct drivers behind why people fall into lookism. One is a positive desire for change, rooted in admiration or the wish to conform. The other is a fear that feels almost like an obsession—the feeling that “I must be like everyone else” (for instance, feeling the need to lose weight excessively). The balance between these two may vary greatly depending on the country or culture in which one was raised. However, we now live in an era where information is shared globally in an instant. Because of this, I believe that values around the world are gradually becoming standardized.
There are countries where people are expected to conform to those around them, and others where being different is praised. But what I want to consider here is not a binary choice of “should we be the same as others, or should we be different?” It is the fact that, from the very beginning, we have the option to “not compare ourselves to anyone at all.”
Our existence is part of a constantly changing world. In fact, we ourselves are the very flow of that change. There is no such thing as a fixed, permanent self anywhere. There is no baseline for comparison when it comes to a fluid process that has no fixed entity. Joining in and having fun doing the same things as those around us can be enjoyable. But when that begins to bring suffering, it is best to quietly step away. After all, we are constantly changing, and we have the power to change at any moment.